 |
| Ghost of Christmas Past |
If you leave your discarded Christmas tree out on the lawn for a long enough time, it will eventually disappear.
A side of my brain reminds me that there is a maintenance department on campus. They keep the place looking good. Facilities are cleaned and kept up, lawns are mowed, leaves are raked, snow is plowed, and solstice holiday shrubs are hauled off. My colleagues' trees were taken away months ago, but we have an almost private yard. The hedges that keep students from cutting past our windows must obscure the sight of decaying conifers from the eyes of the grounds crew.
That's just the rational side noodlin'. The other ninety percent of my brain knows that there are elves that cobble shoes at night and run off with unwanted flora by day. Did you know that the photo traps used on Finding Bigfoot cost $460 each? They don't even come with cameras; you have to buy those separately! That frickin' ten percent of my brain keeps holding me back.
Pro Tip #3 (though not properly numbered, that nugget about cryptozoology budgets surely counts): Most of the people that post "Pro Tips" on the Internet have never been paid to perform the acts for which they are giving advice.
Three items led my mind down this bizarre path. First and foremost, my Christmas tree disappeared yesterday afternoon. It was lying on the grass all morning (just as it had the previous fifty-eight mornings) and then it was gone. Next, for some unknown reason, I recalled Ryan North's Dinosaur Comic from February 17th:
 |
| To truly trace my madness, click the link so you can view the rollover caption. |
Finally, I saw this post on Failblog today.
No comments:
Post a Comment